1. Find the nearest Dots store. My friends who make fun of me for shopping in Dots don't know what they're missing out on.
2. Go STRAIGHT to the back, do not pass go, and don't stop until you hit the clearance racks. The ones with signs over them reading $3, $5, and $7.
3. Pull out cute blue dress with the $3 tag and see the potential it has to hug every bulge in your body the wrong way. Grab a bigger size than normal, fork over your hard-earned three dolla make me wanna holla, and exit.
4. Night before church, try it on and realize it is the butt-hugger you feared it would be. Frantically search the room for something to stretch it over for the night. It needs to be wearable in 8 hours. And since I can't drop 10 pounds quite that fast, the dress needs to grow.
|My dress, stretching to it's full potential.|
6. In the morning, slowly pull off and cross your fingers. Stomp your foot in annoyance that you used a rectangular shaped basket instead of a round one, but hope those little bulges work themselves out.
7. accessorize with a wide belt easily found at Goodwill for a buck or 2, and a dollar store necklace. Throw on Payless clearanced shoes to finish off the look.
|I would have shown you a few more options, but frankly I felt really stupid posing for pictures. (I looked stupid too, hence the chopped off head!)|